Its bad enough not knowing who your real friends are. Sure, everyone loves you when you've got the smoker going in the backyard, but where are they when its time to clean out the gutters?
Now, this lifestyle is even starting to draw stares and whispered comments from onlookers. I rushed to the store tonight arriving just before they closed at 10pm. I quickly grabbed 10# of brown sugar, 10# of white sugar, 2 big boxes of kosher salt, 5 gallons of vinegar, and all the 64oz bottles of ketchup they had, then hurried to the checkout line.
I could tell the girl wanted to ask, but then I guess she thought better of it, and just quietly bagged my order without making eye contact. I had to make sauce! There's no law against that. It's not like I was buying all the girlie magazines or a cart full of panty hose. Its all for the sauce! This is still America isn't it? They locked the doors behind me and watched as I drove away.
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